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>> Sunday, 3 April 2011
here can be times, too, when what appears to be bitterness on the part of the ex-wife (and more importantly, the mother of the children from the first marriage) may actually be something quite different. Sometimes when a second wife (particularly one without children of her own) assumes that an ex-wife is acting out of bitterness and vengefulness the reason for the ex-wife's behavior may actually be much less malevolent than it may seem.
Many second-time-around couples want very much to be a family and include the children of the first marriage. Well-intended second wives want very much to become close to their husband's children as well. Second wives without children of their own may look forward to having stepchildren but may not understand the feelings mothers often have. Second wives with babies/toddlers from the present marriage may be torn between the love they have for their own child and the love they'd like to have for their husband's older children. The stepmother with children of her own from a previous marriage may have difficulty relating to children who are very different from her own. In the home of the married couple both partners usually and rightfully take the role of making the rules, so while stepmothers may be perfectly reasonable in expecting certain rules of the house to be followed, sometimes rules-of-the-house can conflict - in the children's eyes and sometimes in fact - with who has the right to tell children what they can and cannot do in general.
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